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Please ignore the previous post to stop sending in your samples. This was sent out by an employee in our post room who opened a particularly liquid motion while eating his bhaji. As you can see this caused much annoyance as he had to eat around the wet bits. Please when you are sending in your samples can you ensure it is only yours and yours alone. Our testers have recently found a large amount of dog and cat faeces which we are unable to prescribe for, although our pet division may open soon. May also ask you to remember to use a sealed plastic container as a Jiffy bag has insufficient protection. All donations welcome.

We can see the game you are playing. You obviously have nothing better do do with your time. I urge you to stop jeopardizing the relationship we have with our esteemed customers. If you are responsible for posting this nasty business to us you will be found out. Your attempts to ruin our business and our reputation is despicable.

Well, stop scamming and robbing the elderly then. You bunch of charlatans.